”She reached out to touch me and I flinched. “Salome?”“I'm dirty. Filthy. She's leaking out of me right now.” I could feel her. “Paloma, don't you think you deserve better?”“Than a girl who loved me so much, she let that terrible bitch fuck her up the ass to keep me safe?” Paloma cupped my face before I could pull back. She held me in place. “Then a girl willing to humiliate herself.”“It wasn't humiliating after a while,” I muttered. “I really, really liked it.”“You're supposed to enjoy anal sex,” said Paloma. “It's not surprising that your body got more and more used to it. If she wasn't someone you despised, you might have found pleasure in it sooner.”“If it was with you.” I bit my lip. “I've been having sex and forcing you not to. I've been insisting to wait until marriage all while I was cheating on you.”“Are you still a virgin?” she asked. She leaned forward, her lips nearing mine. “I think you are. You wouldn't let her have that.”“It's yours. Always. For as long as I could. “Is this something I should be worried about? She’s kissed you once already.”“You don’t have to worry; it was just an isolated incident,” I say.“You say that, but it isn’t like you’re gonna stop seeing your best friend. What if she tries again?” She pauses then speaks again before I can answer. “How can we resolve this for sure?”“I don’t know, have sex with her?” I say jokingly.“Maybe you should,” she says.“Are you serious?” I ask, sitting up.“I am. If she wants you that bad, and you still have some feelings for her too, maybe it's best to get it out of your system.”“Even if we do decide to do that, I don’t think Skylar would like it,” I say, though the thought of getting with Jen again is exciting.The idea bounces back and forth for a few minutes. I can’t believe my own fiancée is encouraging me to have sex with my best friend. Still, I feel a tug of guilt for lying about how the kiss happened, and I wonder if Alice would feel the same way if she knew I initiated it. The guilt.
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